Archive for the 'What the @#!' Category

My Five-Year-Old: Stubborn and Surly

five year old amesHere’s a book I won’t be buying - Your Five Year Old: Sunny and Serene by Louise Bates Ames (via American Family).

Sunny? Serene? Doesn’t compute.

Might be fun to check this book out of the library to see what I’m missing.

What I’m pretty sure is going on in my five-year-old’s head (and mine most of the time when I was growing up so I understand) is verbalized by the creator of HBO series The Wire, David Simon:

I will confess to you now that anything I have ever accomplished as a writer, as somebody doing TV, as anything I have ever done in life down to, like, cleaning up my room, has been accomplished because I was going to show people that they were f*cked up and wrong and that I was the f*cking center of the universe, and the sooner they got hip to that, the happier they would all be … That’s what’s going on in my head.

I should save this entry to show psychotherapists in the future.

(I cleaned up the F-word just to keep my cuss-o-meter low.)

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Color Me A Prude

broken heartThe Freakonomics blog asked some New York students about their college experience. Their responses to the ones about sex, really shocked me. Of course, I’m pretty atypical since I got married straight out of college, two months shy of my 22nd birthday.

Ali, 21, Senior, Journalism, New York University

How many more people do you think you’ll sleep with before you get married?

I intend to sleep with a lot of people before I get married (if I get married). I think I’ll sleep with at least 20 people, maybe five of which will be as a part of committed relationships.

How many would you like to?

I’d like to sleep with way more than 20! But let’s be modest. 30? Yeah, 30.

The other responses ranged from a few to two dozen.

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So-Called Math Education

Who knew there were so many different ways to solve 26×31 or 133/6?! Life just keeps getting more complicated. Our poor kids are really in for it and therefore so are we, their poor parents. ARGH.

Meterologist MJ McDermott lists the following problems graduates of the American school system are having with math:

  1. Inability to work alone without checking in with others (too much group work)
  2. Lack of math fluency in the symbolic language of math
  3. Lack of math basic skills, e.g., trig, algebra, arithmetic.
  4. Dependence on calculator (can’t do 4×6 without a calculator)

In the end, McDermott recommends Singapore math for children having trouble with math. There was also a great discussion of these various math education methods–TERC and Everyday Math–at kitchen table math, the sequel.

What do you think of your own or your child’s math education?

HT: Lilian, math teacher extraordinaire

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Male or Female - Just Can’t Win

Based on my last ramblings about the books I’m reading, Gender Guesser tells me that I’m a “Weak MALE” if the 425 words I submitted for gender analysis is in the informal style. I’m a “Weak FEMALE” if what I wrote was meant to be formal. What the @#!

gender guesser writing

via Jezebel

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Pregnant Women with Girls are Batty

Don’t blame the boys!

Going a bit dippy is a common pregnancy trait. But if you really go doolally, you could be carrying a girl. In tests, mums carrying boys out-perform mums carrying girls. But after the birth your brain (usually!) gets back on track.

via Mothercare

Based on on my behavior, I wonder if people think I’m carrying a boy or a girl.

Don’t answer that!

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Cozy Shower

IMG 7070
Work has never been so much fun.

I saw this sign on one of the doors over at Marv’s office building. How many people do you think have showered together so far?

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You’re Not My Mom

funny-pictures-cats-tongues-mom

Believe it or not. I’ve actually had kids say this to me when I prevented them from bashing their skulls in at the pool doing one of their crazy stunts. Where were their parents? Many floors up in their apartment.

via I Can Has Cheezburger?

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False Advertising of Mini Jelly Babies

Take a good look look at this bag of mini jelly babies from Marks & Spencer.

IMG 6883

The jelly babies on the packaging look like fresh, plump, shiny, happy babies. This is what they really look like.

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Do these bear any resemblance to the jelly babies on the package?

Nobody likes this strange powdered confection that is hard on the outside and mushy on the inside. The weirdest texture ever and not at all what you’d expect of a gummy candy. Blech.

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Don’t Be A Jerk

Or you could find yourself asking a certain blog publisher to remove an obnoxious comment which she may or may not be inclined to do.

She knows why you want the obnoxious comment removed.

Said obnoxious comment happens to rank on the first page of a Google search for your name.

The rest of the search results are all respectable scientific papers that reflect positively on your image.

You didn’t think her little ol’ science blog would have just as great of an impact on Google, didja?

Be honest about why you want the obnoxious comment removed and maybe even tell her you were drunk off your a** when you wrote it.

She may remove it. She may not.

Just remember that what you say online stays online and could come back to bite you in the a**.

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Bastards

“I had hoped that they had evolved beyond this.”

~Columbia University economics professor Ray Fisman, on the results of his speed-dating study, which found that men avoided women who they believed were smarter or more ambitious than themselves.

Who needs ‘em?

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