Cotton-Pickin’ Days

“Each home has been reduced to the bare essentials — to barer essentials than most primitive people would consider possible. Only one woman’s hands to feed the baby, answer the telephone, turn off the gas under the pot that is boiling over, soothe the older child who has broken a toy, and open both doors at once. She is a nutritionist, a child psychologist, an engineer, a production manager, an expert buyer, all in one. Her husband sees her as free to plan her own time, and envies her; she sees him as having regular hours and envies him.”

~Margaret Mead (December 16, 1901 November 15, 1978) was an American cultural anthropologist.

NB: Rachel left a comment yesterday inviting us to participate in a study of parenting views and practices being conducted by Dr. Kim White-Mills and Dr. Catherine Dobris of Indiana University-Purdue University Indianapolis. Head over and express your opinion!

Photo: libraryman

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Maureen McCabe contributed her list of good blogging habits to the ProBlogger project and I loved the last one she mentioned.

10. Try to remember what Columbus resident and writer / cartoonist James Thurber wrote: ?Don?t get it right, just get it written.?

This advice couldn’t have come at a better time. I am on page six of the 10 page chapter I have to write on the genetics of depression. I hope I can finish it by the end of the month!

continue reading

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When I was a kid I had no idea I lived in a mansion. Then I went to a friend’s house and I was like – “Oh”.

~Paris Hilton

Did she never read a book? I can understand that in Paris’s rarefied world, she would be more likely to mingle with other millionaires’ children, but there are thousands of books out there that describe what life is like for people of all social strata, cultures, and life situations.

Here are a few that come immediately to mind. I know they’re not exactly contemporary but they would at least give someone a clue that life isn’t always about money, shopping, and partying.

• Little House on the Prairie and other books by Laura Ingalls Wilder



• Anne Frank: The Diary of a Young girl
• The Outsiders by SE Hinton
• Anne of Green Gables by LM Montgomery
• Little Women by Louisa May Alcott

What books would you recommend to Ms. Hilton?

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Kathy Lette, 47, wrote her first novel when she was 20 and has published several more since. She has been a sitcom-writer, a columnist and a singer.

Women suffer from facial prejudice. It’s increasingly hard to resist cosmetic surgery, but, really, a woman should never pick her nose – especially from a catalogue.

The Sunday Times Style Magazine, April 30, 2006

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Anna [Deavere Smith] says that women are too careful to avoid conflict. Women in high-powered positions tend to do less arguing than their male counterparts, she says. “I think that we should be bolder?we should argue.”

~From Oprah, October 2005

Perhaps Anna would be proud of me?

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The Dalai Lama gave multiple definitions for nonviolence during the hour-long conversation [at Stanford], including compassion and “protection for all living things.” “Violence is destruction; nonviolence is construction,” he said.

But the boundaries between violence and nonviolence cannot be determined simply by observing actions on their surface, he said. An individual can use nice words to cheat or exploit another, he said. Conversely, a harsh action could be done out of compassion and the intent to protect others, he added. Limited violence can be permissible, and countering a violent action with a strong countermeasure sometimes is not only permissible “but is the right thing to do,” he said.

Stanford Report, November 9, 2005

The Dalai Lama may have been referring to capital punishment and war between countries, but I think the concept could be applied to parenting as well. We can (not so easily) use only “nice words” or false praise when speaking to our children, but when it’s devoid of meaning, it’s also devoid of any positive effect. Similarly, when we speak harshly to our children to keep them out of danger or to teach a valuable lesson, it doesn’t necessarily cause irreparable harm to their ego.

The Dalai Lama is a wise, wise man.

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Despite all the news about Google Book Search formerly known as Google Print, I hadn’t bothered to check it out until mentioned it. Out of curiosity, I keyed in some thoughts that had been running around in my head these last few days (and my own name, but that turned up nothing). Based on these results, I think Google Book Search could be a success because I found a couple of books I’d be interested in buying.

“impatience is a virtue”

For me, impatience is a virtue, and patience a vice, since patience is so often an excuse for inactivity.
~Paragraphs on Translation by Peter Newmark

Impatience is a virtue and I get a little more angelic every day I live this shit.
~Displicit by Bob Janis

overreacting mothers

It’s possible we devote most of our lives to fulfilling the craving for a positive self image. How often do we find ourselves: overreacting at even the hint of criticism?
~Buddhism for Mothers by Sarah Napthali

Overreacting when your child does something bad can be a natural part of parenting. Often this stems from fatigue, stress, and the belief that you should be able to keep your child from doing bad things; and that if she does bad things, it’s because you’re a bad parent. It is helpful to remember that one person can’t really control the actions of another.
~Stepping Stones 10 Steps to Seizing Passion and Purpose by Timothy L Sams

“moving to London”

The two main reasons given for moving to London were to take up a job and to enter higher education; a few women moved either with a man or to join a man in London and then looked for a job after they arrived.
~Changing Britain: Families and Households in the 1900s

At lunchtime we Japanese staff sometimes went to a Chinese restaurant in the East End, where we would be less conspicuous – we weren’t really supposed to go to cheap low-grade places like that. I was told before moving to London that Senior Clerks like me should make sure we ate at restaurants with proper tablecloths.
~The History of Mitsubishi Corporation in London: 1915 to Present Day by Pernille Rudlin

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Most of my friends, including the thin ones, know what it’s like when someone mistakens them for being pregnant. Sometimes it’s a high-waisted dress that prompts the comment (said dress soon to end up in the back of the closet) or pudginess from recent extravagant eating. Even Sandra Bullock is not immune:

Everyone seems to think I’m pregnant now. It’s called weight gain.

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In light of today’s discussion about whether or not to keep Stephen in school, I’m reminded of this quote from the Dalai Lama in The Art of Happiness.

Imagine what it would be like if we went through life never encountering an enemy or any other obstacles…never encountering any challenge, never tested–in short, if everyone continued to treat us like a baby. …if it persisted it could only result in one becoming a sort of gelatinous mass, a monstrosity really–with the mental and emotional development of veal. It’s the very struggle of life that makes us who we are. And it is our enemies that test us, provide us with the resistance necessary for growth.

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In my opinion, reading about blogs is as much fun as reading them. Joel Achenbach of The Washington Post has a hilarious take on his own blog and the blogosphere in general. Here’s a snippet:

I constantly tell myself: Ignore the blog. Do your work. You are an enormous literary figure and cultural icon, not a mere “blogger.” You must produce high-end journalism with grand themes and huge groaning multi-syllabic words like “eschatological,” and you can’t be dribbling away all your ideas on the blog. Be strong! Resist the blog!

And then . . . I hear it yowling.

The blog is hungry. The blog will not be ignored. It is an insatiable little beast, a creature still unclassified by science — hairy, warty, slobbering, with its own fiendish agenda.

*****
As an artist, my normal impulse is to write things that people don’t care about and, ideally, can’t even understand. Gibberish.

It’s obvious what people want: political screeds and celebrity gossip.

I know that my blog will be read by more people if it mentions famous celebrities who might be secretly boinking, such as Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie.

This is so true. One of the most popular posts I have ever written was about the DNA test Oprah took to confirm her membership in the African Zulu tribe. Since then, I’ve kept my eyes peeled for stories about celebrities and their DNA. No such luck yet.

Pointer from SYNTAGMA.

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