Archive for the 'Kids' Category

Giftedness Not Required

from PostSecret

For more interesting reading on giftedness, see A Very Modern Epidemic: Gifted Children at WSJ.com’s The Juggle. And for a peek into what being gifted is like in Singapore, check out Of Kids, Education and Everything Else Under the Sun by Monica Lim. I especially liked Monica’s post, How to tell if your child is intellectually gifted in which she says:

Being gifted and being “smart” is not the same thing.

People have often argued that the GEP (gifted education program) is discriminatory because there are late bloomers who do pretty well later on in life. I think this arises because there is a confusion between being gifted and being smart. It’s probably safe to say that all gifted children are smart, but not all smart children are gifted. Research shows that in general, about 1% of each cohort is intellectually gifted.

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Bunk Bed Safety

bunk bedsStephen had such a fabulous time playing on the top bunk bed at his friend’s house last week that we thought we might get him bunk beds when we move to Singapore this summer. Now I’m not so sure.

A study in the journal Pediatrics has found that more than 35,000 children and young adults get hurt on bunk bed each year. Half of the injuries affect children under age 6 and they were related to falls having to do with the ladder or jumping off. Most injuries were cuts, scrapes, and bruises but 20% were fractures.

…most bunk bed–related injuries are associated with objects around the bed, by children playing in and around the bed, or by children jumping on and off the bed

Even worse, males are injured more often than females. There’s even “bunk bed fracture” caused by children jumping or falling with their feet/legs out-stretched.

The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC) recommends:

  1. Guardrail gaps are <= 3.5 inches to prevent hanging and strangulation
  2. Side rails are present on both sides
  3. Mattress foundation is sturdy and secure
  4. Mattress of correct size is used
  5. Children younger than 6 years should not sleep in the upper bunk
  6. Children should be discouraged from playing on bunk beds
  7. Night lights should be used to prevent falls
  8. Hazardous objects should be removed from around the bed
  9. Bunk beds should not be placed too close to ceiling fans or other ceiling fixtures

My sister and I shared a room until I started high school and for part of that time, our beds were in a bunk bed configuration. I don’t recall us ever getting hurt on it but then again, our friends were not allowed to play in our bedroom (our house rule kept guests in common areas like the living room) so there was never rough housing going on that involved the beds.

Read the Pediatrics study if you feel like freaking yourself out over bunk beds. :P

via NY Times

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My Five-Year-Old: Stubborn and Surly

five year old amesHere’s a book I won’t be buying - Your Five Year Old: Sunny and Serene by Louise Bates Ames (via American Family).

Sunny? Serene? Doesn’t compute.

Might be fun to check this book out of the library to see what I’m missing.

What I’m pretty sure is going on in my five-year-old’s head (and mine most of the time when I was growing up so I understand) is verbalized by the creator of HBO series The Wire, David Simon:

I will confess to you now that anything I have ever accomplished as a writer, as somebody doing TV, as anything I have ever done in life down to, like, cleaning up my room, has been accomplished because I was going to show people that they were f*cked up and wrong and that I was the f*cking center of the universe, and the sooner they got hip to that, the happier they would all be … That’s what’s going on in my head.

I should save this entry to show psychotherapists in the future.

(I cleaned up the F-word just to keep my cuss-o-meter low.)

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Sunday Salon: Nostalgic for Children’s Books

Earlier this week, I was reminiscing with Lilian and my sister about various children’s books I read when I was in elementary school in the U.S. To my great surprise and dismay (!), Lilian hadn’t heard of some of them.

I now have the great pleasure of introducing these books to Stephen and just so nobody else can claim they’ve never heard of my favorite children’s books for the elementary (primary) school crowd, here’s a short list. What other books would you add?

1. Little Critter Stories by Mercer Mayer

Here’s Mercer Mayer reading aloud a Little Critter story on YouTube - Just A Secret:

 

2. The Great Brain series by John Dennis Fitzerald and illustrated by Mercer Mayer! - The thing I remember most from these books was how the Great Brain’s parents disciplined him using the silent treatment.

From Wikipedia :

The better-educated, more progressive Fitzgeralds are a notable exception with their use of the silent treatment. This means that Mr. and Mrs. Fitzgerald will not talk to or acknowledge the boy or boys being punished for a day, a week, or longer depending on the circumstances. J.D. frequently describes the silent treatment as worse than a whipping because of the emotional impact of being ignored by his parents, and at times says that he wishes his parents would just give them a whipping and get it over with.

3. Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle by Betty MacDonald - Her disciplinary techniques are truly ingenious.

4. A Light in the Attic and Where the Sidewalk Ends by Shel Silverstein

5. Jacob Two Two and the Hooded Fang by Mordecai Richler - I’d forgotten about this book until my sister reminded me.

6. The Littles series by John Peterson

~~~~~

Oops! I always forget to tell everyone to join The Sunday Salon!

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The Evil Eye


http://view.break.com/422660 - Watch more free videos

I don’t know what I like better - the baby’s adorable laughter or his evil eye.

via Boing Boing

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Laptops Are To Flushing Toilets

Earlier this week on a very rainy morning, parents were allowed to bring the kids directly into the school rather than wait in line outside on the playground. It was a rare opportunity for me to have a peek inside Stephen’s classroom at the start of a busy day. To my amazement, the teacher was setting up laptops for them. It was the weekly Laptop Day and they were all very excited.

laptop caseOut of a huge aluminum shipping container (that looks something like the one pictured but much larger) came 15 or so laptops for the kids. Each silver laptop was placed in groups of three on the low tables. Stephen told me that they work on the computers with a partner and play some kind of teddy bear game. I was really pleased to see that the school was preparing the children for a high-tech future.

But would you believe that not everyone thinks children as young as kindergarten should have access to computers? One commenter said in a post at TechCrunch about a children’s website, Kindersay:

I don’t see why kids need a laptop for? Sorry if you are the kind of parents allows childen to play games all day.

*steam shoots out of my ears*

My favorite analogy in response to this type of attitude:

The computer is becoming as common and vital as the toilet. Parents who think they should or can keep their kids from it might as well have an outhouse. After all, a toilet and outhouse serve the same function and the latter may be more environmentally friendly!

Stephen has his own laptop at home on which he spends between 0 to 60 minutes each day totally supervised. What he sees online inspires him and yes, teaches him. I figure now that he’s got the toilet thing down pat, it’s time for him to conquer the computer!

FYI, here are some of Stephen’s favorite websites:

What websites do your kids like?

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Kindergarten Ready or Not?

Stephen completed his first year of full-time school in mid-July. It was a pretty good year overall, full of learning and developmental achievements like reading, writing, and zipping up his own jacket. Back when he started the school year, I didn’t even know if he’d make it through lunch at school in the cafeteria confronted with strange food choices. Now he tells me he tries new things every day! Cucumbers! Lettuce! Carrots! Baked beans! School has been good for him.

IMG 5977There have been, of course, a few bumps along the road. Being one of the youngest in class and a singleton as well, it’s been a challenge for him to learn some of the social graces like waiting his turn. But I’d take this anyday over academic challenges. (So I’m showing my true colors….)

In any case, I just read this piece by Elizabeth Weil about the practice of “redshirting” children so they start school a year later than the actual cut-off. One study showed that more redshirted children take the SAT and attend four-year college and university. Is that a reflection of the child’s abilities or the type of parent who would intentionally hold a child back to give him/her an advantage?

For just a brief moment, I considered holding Stephen back but my competitive nature pushed him forward. Besides, I was always among the younger children in class and didn’t suffer for it. In fact, I’d always wished I could have skipped a grade and shown how brilliant I really was. Like my friend SinP. ;)

Fred Morrison, developmental psychologist:

You couldn’t find a kid who skips a grade these days. We used to revere individual accomplishment. Now we revere self-esteem, and the reverence has snowballed in unconscious ways – into parents always wanting their children to feel good, wanting everything to be pleasant.

Heck if Stephen’s going to be lulled into complacency. He’s learning that he doesn’t always win the drawing competition (even though I think he should! ha) or even get to be first in line.

When the end-of-school assessments rolled around, I began to hear stories of other children’s challenges. One child Stephen’s age in another school was apparently sent to an “occupational therapist” because he had a difficult time paying attention in class and concentrating. lock lacesThe OT assessed him on a number of skills like tying his shoelaces of all things. Who has shoelaces anymore? Even Marv uses a shoehorn to put his laced shoes on instead of tying and untying them every day. And look at these cool lock laces.

That made me curious about what skills schools think make a child ready for school. In the article, children have to complete these tasks in a 20-minute test:

  • Skip
  • Jump
  • Walk backward
  • Cut out a diamond on a dotted line
  • Copy the word cat
  • Draw a person
  • Listen to a story
  • Answer simple vocabulary questions like what melts, what explodes and what flies

Here are some other skills from a FamilyEducation.com kindergarten readiness checklist:

  • Recognize rhyming sounds
  • Show understanding of general times of day
  • Manage bathroom needs
  • Button shirts, pants, coats, and zip up zippers
  • Begin to control oneself

I don’t believe a child’s ability can be assessed in 20 minutes especially with a teacher who s/he has never met before. Another issue is situational behavior. Stephen may act out at school because there are 25 other children acting out. On the other hand, he learns some life skills from the other children as well. At home, he’d rather have me help him put on his shoes and socks and at school, he knows he’s got to do it on his own and he does it.

Figuring out whether a child is ready for school or not is hit or miss. Sometimes I wonder what it would have been like had Stephen been the oldest rather than youngest, but I believe that more important than his age is the support he gets at school and at home. And fortunately, he gets plenty from both places.

HT: Rice Daddies

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Snoop Dogg is Inappropriate

Picture this.

Three five-year-old boys who’re part of the baaad pack at school stand in front of a TV with Snoop Dogg’s latest music video blaring. Knees bopping, fingers doing “the sign,” the boys chant the rap with eyes glued to the barely clad women on the screen gyrating. The song is about BLEEPING. And guess what? Those boys know the “song” so well that they can even sing the parts about BLEEPING. It obviously wasn’t the first time they’d seen or heard it.

And now I’ve found the music video they were watching. It’s even more awful than I thought it was! Couldn’t hear half of it while I was there and now I’ve heard too much. I think I have to go wash my eyes and ears out. I really regret not having turned that off even if I was at someone else’s house and had already turned it down once before. Sooo inappropriate!!!

Thank goodness Stephen wasn’t in the room. ARGH. Another reason I don’t feel comfortable dropping him off at birthday parties and returning later to pick him up.

Update: My sis just sent me the link to this video for purification purposes.

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Granoli

Fashion Angel Living Doll- IzzyBarbie lovers are taking offense to my characterization of their dolly in a review I wrote for Play Library about the Fashion Angels.

They quoted me as saying,

…they are well made and perky rather than trashy (Bratz) and not so provocative (Barbie). Their wardrobe is amazing - glitter, sequens, and leopard print trims all sturdily tailored for endless changes of ensemble.

And they continued in response,

What planet is that person living on? Laughing [emoticon] I’ll bet that woman doesn’t allow her child to watch television, and makes her eat granola and tofu! LOL! Laughing [emoticon]

Granola and tofu? YUM!!!

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No Pictures Please

Today, I was at Stephen’s school helping the kids put on their costumes for the annual Christmas show. During the chaos, I videotaped them milling about dressed as angels, snowmen, and stars and also took some photos. At first, I intended to take a picture of everyone to make sure that all were included then get the shots developed later this week. But soon, one of the teachers came over and whispered that technically, I shouldn’t be taking photos of other people’s kids because a parent in another class had specifically requested that their child not be photographed. What the @#!

I couldn’t believe that the type of parents Esther Rantzen wrote about in the Times Online in October really do exist! She is the founder of ChildLine, a toll free number in the UK which children can dial and ask for help with abuse. In the piece, she touched on the difficulty of balancing between protecting our children and overprotecting them.

The truth is that paedophiles are unscrupulous and cunning and they have taken jobs as school bus drivers, sports coaches and youth club leaders to gain access to children.

However, the letter does express a real fear. Over the past 20 years, alongside sensible advances such as the creation of commissioners for children and a minister for children, there have been examples of daft over-zealousness.

Why on earth prevent parents taking photographs of their children performing in a nativity play or pictures of their children playing football? The five-year-old who plays Joseph at Christmas time, the 10-year-old who scores a miraculous goal for his team, deserve their place in the family album.

The loss of innocent contact is a real deprivation for a child. Why shouldn’t a teacher cuddle a six-year-old who has fallen down in the playground? It would be a tragedy if fathers were inhibited from hugging their daughters. The abused children I have met desperately want and need the “safe cuddles” that they never receive. We do all children a huge disservice by assuming that all adults are paedophiles.

I have always taken care not to post pictures of other children’s faces and am even shying away from posting pictures of Stephen. And, thankfully, since the teachers know me well, I wasn’t thrown in jail today. Even more important, Stephen is here with me, well loved and cared for.

If you’re a kid living in the UK and need someone to talk to about any problem, call ChildLine. They’ve got counsellors who can help you. 0800 1111

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