Try telling this to East Asian parents:

Shame is usually viewed as a maladaptive emotion. Shame refers to a negative focus on aspects of the “self” in response to a wrongdoing (”I’m a horrible person for doing that”). In contrast, guilt can be adaptive or maladaptive. Guilt refers to a focus on the wrongdoing which, in adaptive guilt, leads to reparation (e.g., “I feel bad for what I did and I should apologize”).

~Child Psychology Research Blog

For more on the Asian parent mindset, see this article by Wen-Mei Chou and Harris Ty Leonard – Fix My Children: Working With Strong-Minded Asian Parents (pdf).

For more on shaming, see “Good” Children – at What Price?

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