During our first week in Vietnam, we were invited out to dinner at one of the fancier restaurants in town. Besides us, the dinner party consisted of the two managers of our apartment building, one of their spouses, and another couple. Oh, and I almost forgot, Stephen was with us too.

We had no idea the other couple wasn’t bringing their two young girls. Not that it would have mattered because we were new in town and didn’t have a babysitter. If we had known, I might have stayed home with Stephen. But everything turned out fine because Stephen slept on my lap through the entire dinner.

Stephen is usually with us whenever we go out. We know he enjoys it and also think it’s part of learning appropriate social behavior. Most often, he’s as well-behaved as a three-year-old can possibly be. Occasionally, he throws a tantrum because he’s overly tired, but a break outside gives him the breather he needs to get everything under control.

The most important consideration when eating out is choosing a restaurant that welcomes or at least doesn’t frown upon children. Last week, the New York Times had an article about restaurant and cafe owners who think they’re promoting good manners by putting up signs that say:

…children of all ages have to behave and use their indoor voices when coming to A Taste of Heaven.

So what’s their standard of good behavior? Some people, like my dad, enjoy kids and think they should be free to “express” themselves. I keep a close eye on Stephen when we’re in public because we are considerate of other people’s privacy and personal space. But, I don’t think the solution is to shut kids up and sit them down. In fact, there are plenty of ADULT customers I wish would do that.

And so simmers another skirmish between the childless and the child-centered, a culture clash increasingly common in restaurants and other public spaces as a new generation of busy, older, well-off parents ferry little ones with them.

The Supreme Court Justice John Roberts had the nerve to bring his son and daughter to a White House press conference at which the four-year-old boy did the lambada right in front of President Bush making his announcement. When Justice Roberts keeps his children at home, I may consider it too.

Pointer from New West Bozeman.