The first time you interacted with me, whether it was the first time you read something I wrote maybe in one of my blogs or the first time we met in person, what did you think of me?

said that she thinks of me as being “energetic” and “feisty”. I’d also hope “sincere” comes to mind too.

Trying to give people a positive impression isn’t always so easy when all they see are words on a computer screen. My credentials, background, and intentions are all over the Genetics and Public Health Blog and they’re in a few places here at Cotton-Pickin’ Days if you look for them. But does it convince you that I mean no harm and only want to help?

Michelle T. Sterling, founder of Global Image Group, says we are evaluated within the first three seconds of a new encounter.

  • If you appear to be of comparable business or social level, you are considered suitable for further interaction.
  • If you appear to be of higher business or social status, you are admired and cultivated as a valuable contact.
  • If you appear to be of lower business or social standing, you are tolerated but kept at arm’s length.

While Sterling is talking about face-to-face meetings, I think this probably applies to online interactions as well. I had a couple encounters this week that left me wondering about the kind of first (or later) impressions people have of me. In one incident, I disagreed strongly with what someone said about parenting and probably made everyone think I was an extreme psycho. The other incident, I reached out with only good intentions, but the way the person reacted made me wonder why she didn’t trust me at the very start.

This isn’t an issue of self-esteem or self-worth. It’s more like self-evaluation. In the first situation, I shouldn’t have flipped out just because someone said things that I vehemently disagree with or are just flat out wrong. In the second situation, I was probably too obsequious. In both cases, I should have let some things slide off like water off a duck’s back instead of obsessing about it for days.

What kind of first impression do you think you make? And is there anything you’d like to change?

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